Sword Of The Sea's watery allegory is no great Journey

You can't rewild the desert when you're busy wiping out

A popular stereotype of surfers is that they're attractive airheads. A fit waverider doesn't have time for big thoughts, beyond explaining that the moon is, like, totally in league with the whales, man. This is a lame stereotype, and yet a helpful image when it comes to explaining how I feel about dashing surf 'em up Sword Of The Sea. (We don't mind reviewing 5-month old games here at Jank). This game is beautiful, toned, ripped, fashionable, athletic, and it has a great ear for music. It also has the conversational skills of a post-huff stoner, and its visual similarity to Journey only invites an unflattering comparison.

The game itself is an approachable ride. You swoop along in smooth arcs and can leap into the air, double-jumping for extra trick time, cruising through ultimately linear sandy levels that coax you toward lanterns and bells that turn sand into seawater and unlock the way to the next area. It only lasts about 3 hours too, meaning it can glide in and out of your life with unobnoxious merit. If you've got a subscription service that includes the game, there are worse ways to spend an evening.

Told you it looks good.

Three game devs climb a mountain - part 4

"I don't know if coming up here was the right call, gang."

We finally reach the summit of the first mountain. Holly Jencka, Emeric Thoa and I gather by the fire as Bennett Foddy talks about random generation and orthodox versus unorthodox game design. You can tell this man is a professor. I feel like I am getting a university class for less than the thousands of pounds of debt it would otherwise cost. I forcefeed him a roast marshmallow but he keeps talking. 

Meanwhile, Holly charges towards the Roots. This is Peak's newest biome, a dense forest of spiders, poisonous mushrooms, exploding spore pods, and other fungal threats. I follow dutifully, asking more questions as random gusts of wind whip through the canopy.

New to this series? Click here

The geometry and layout of every island in Peak is procedurally generated, which means some might be wildly more tough than others. Again, this devotion to randomness is something the three developers haven't necessarily pursued.

The three Peak players look toward a giant toadstool and a green vine that will get them across to it.
Just a simple vine rope to the next mushroom. Simple.

"When we started [with White Knuckle]," says Holly, "we considered: do we want to do fully procedural level generation? But it is really quite difficult. People think

What you should play this weekend

Tell us what you are playing in the comments

The weekend approacheth, which means a long languorous release from work for some, and brief stolen moments of respite for those with young children (hi). Either way, you may choose, as we do, to fill your downtime with videogames.

Here's what you should - or at least, could - be playing. Tell us what you actually are in the comments.

A person dives while swinging a sword as the player fires akimbo pistols at them.
Best take your keys out your pockets before you land on them mate.

Out Of Action

This cyberpunk first-person shooter seems less like the live service hero shooters of the moment, and more like the Half-Life mods of my youth. A bit Action Half-Life, a bit NeoTokyo, as you bumslide, back-dive and bullet dodge in PvP shootouts. It's also got an offline mode and promises "deep progression", so not strictly retro, but one for the lovers of ghosts and/or shells.

Two sad robots look at each other in MIO: Memories In Orbit.
You can tell these robots are sad, yes?

MIO: Memories In Orbit

I've become a metroidvania guy in recent years, which is unfortunate because most of the genre's best entries are behemoths that take 30 hours or more to finish. MIO, which released a little over a week ago, is getting lots of praise but apparently won't take me

Three game devs climb a mountain - part 3

They still haven't eaten each other, at least

Holly Jencka stuffs girl scout cookies into Bennett Foddy's mouth. She turns and marches on, looking at a rickety-looking rope bridge ahead of us.

"Okay," she says. "We should only do this bridge one at a time... because they have a tendency of collapsing."

We make it over one by one. If we'd tried crossing all at once the bridge would possibly give way under the combined weight of our cartoonishly large heads. It's good to have Holly here, someone who has played Peak more than the rest of us. But this kind of high-stakes multiplayer camaraderie, sometimes lovingly referred to as "friendslop", isn't actually a factor in the games created by these developers. They all make single player stuff. That means their own games feel quite different.

Missed previous entries? Click here

"That sense of isolation adds a lot to the somber mood I think a lot of climbing games have," says Holly. "This game, you don't really feel it, because you're goofing off with three other people but... I think any of the games all of us have made you get this melancholy at points, as you look out over everything

Big Hops review: great veggie-powered movement before it gets lost in the weeds

There's still so few 3D platformers this good on PC

No genre is as unforgiving as the 3D platformer. It's not just that you inevitably invite comparisons to some of the best games ever made (all of them starring Mario). It's that the basic elements of the genre - precision platforming, expressive movement, a camera generous enough to show it all - are only ever an inch away from plunging the player into miserable frustration.

So it is with Big Hops, which is a hop, skip and a jump from Mario Odyssey and yet, in its worst moments, feels more like a big oops.

The Big Hops release trailer.

You play as Hop, a little green frog who lives in a forest with his mother and sister. Through an encounter with Diss, a kind of ambiguous trickster genie, he is whisked away to the void, a purple dimension of floating islands with topsy-turvy gravity reminiscent of Mario Galaxy. The void, in turn, connects to other worlds, and Hop must venture through a desert, tropical islands and deep mines to figure out Diss's motivation and collect parts for an airship (reminiscent of Mario Odyssey) that can take him home.

'There are basically no 3D platformers on PC that feel as good

Why I don't worry about AI game critics

It is because they would be idiots

AI can't do my job. It's annoying I even have to say it (for many of you, I probably don't, but let's get into it for those at the back). There's a huge amount of valid worry about AI and the ways it's replacing human work in our industry. It has hit the voice acting in extraction shooter Arc Raiders, and the textures in whatever the fuck inZOI is. One report showed that 1 in 5 new games on Steam use generative AI. A worrying trend whether you're an artist, actor, or programmer.

In games media, though, we haven't seen as much explicit uptake. The tech is wreaking havoc in other ways, but there are few who'll admit to actually using it to write reviews or news pieces. This might be a case of some writers hiding their use out of shame (it's proven to make you look incompetent and lazy) but I doubt it. I think a lot of us, having made careers out of analysing an endless flow of games, movies, books, and music, just understand a simple, reassuring truth: humans like human art.

An AI cannot review a game because an AI cannot play a game. And

Three game devs climb a mountain - part 2

"I would never do climbing for real"

In Peak, you reach out your hands to grab onto surfaces. Holding left click against a wall or a tree sees you climb, but your stamina bar will drain quickly. Thankfully, players can offer an arm to hoist up a fellow climber in a difficult spot. You'll need to boost and help each other out a lot to reach the summit. It's a good thing the three game developers I have roped into this horrendous jaunt seem to be good at working together.

"I think when you talk about climbing, you're talking about a very strenuous sort of activity," says Holly, plucking fruit from a shrub growing on the side of a cliff and pocketing it for a future snack. "You're talking about this very physical thing. And giving your player character a physical body that obeys some rules of reality helps the feeling of climbing become more real in a sense, right?"

Missed any of this series? Click here

Over the course of a climb in Peak, your stamina bar will become afflicted with all sorts of clutter that reduces how much energy you have - injuries, burns, sleepiness - all reducing how much

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